I'm updating my blog, yo!

I'm not feelin especially healthy today. I'm eating soup and sweating with a not so cute fever. I guess I could look on the bright side of things, I didn't just push out a baby like my friend Sonia did a few hours ago. She probably feels a little worse than I do right now. Guess I'll suck it up. This has been a week of pondering both life and death. The anniversary of my fathers death was on Tuesday and a new life has arrived by way of Sonia's womb this morning. I don't particularly have anything profound or whitty to say at this moment as my thoughts are overrun with my soaring temperature and just how unbelievably hot it feels in here (says the girl who is notoriously cold). I'm gonna finish my soup and try this again later, yo...

One Flaw in Women

I can't remember who sent this to me, but I came across it today and it hit home so I decided to share it.

Jelly Belly...

In the midst of my recognition that I need a bit of transformation, the boythingy so conveniently pointed out my protruding belly. "What's this??" he teases as he nudges a finger into my poonch. I gasp in shame and suck it in replying "Nothing... I don't know what you're talking about!". Obviously shamed, I am immediately soothed with a hug and reassurance that I don't look like a wheel barrel, immediately followed by the encouragement to do crunches. Being that I respect his opinion, and also the knowledge that the poonch definitely needs to go, I have started the crunch regimen. Right before I go to sleep and immediately when I wake up, I am now struggling through 50 crunches. "When did it get so tough to do 50 crunches?" I asked myself after the first grueling set. Then I remembered that I had gained approximately 45 pounds and it had all become so suddenly clear when. So here I stand, completely aware and truthful with myself. I need to do crunches... A whole lotta crunches...

My new haircut...

So I cutted my hairs off! Well, not really, but really...

I have been feelin a bit yucky on the appearance lately. Been wanting a change that matched the transition that I've been going through. The reality of my 30's have been hitting home a bit lately. I have been feeling like I look as old if not older than I am. I have vouched to start exercising again after a lonnnnnnng pause due to an injury to my foot. I've gained a few inches since then and would like to bid them fairwell, but I gotta do some work to push em out the door. So here I am with a new haircut, and a fresh start. St. Patty's Day is my starting point (and my man's birthday!). So it's a good day to make a commitment to myself to continue the transformation into the woman I hope to become.

Here goes nothin...

My mother recently lost her boyfriend of 14 years. I was fortunate enough to go spend time with her in Arizona to keep her company during a really tough time. I can only imagine how she feels having lost him after so many years. As much of an old curmudgen as he was, she loved him so much. Being out there also gave me an opportunity to heal both physically and emotionally. These were my surroundings. Nothing quite like some fresh air to move through the pain.

My non-blog...

So I am inspired to start my non-blog today. A nice little journal all out in the open for all to see. A friend inspired me to move beyond the walls of Myspace and into a more wide open forum to express myself. The last few weeks have been a bit trying. I have moved on from a destructive and unhealthy situation with a man from my past. In the guise of being 'uplifting' and 'enlightening' to me, he has bled me of my time, attention and money. Yes even money. I'm not afraid to admit that I am a giving person. Even to a fault. I have been known to give to others even neglecting my self of my own needs, let alone wants, in the wake of it. I have learned to be more cautious. I have learned that sometimes it's best to leave the past in the past.

I am stronger today than I have ever been. The lessons I have learned will only serve to better me. I WILL NOT LET FALLING PEOPLE PULL ME DOWN WITH THEM.

I am Wonder Woman.

I will fly this Invisible Plane till the wings fall off...